Ho Hum

Still plugging along. Not very enthusiastically, but still going. A bit bored of the fruits and vegetables I’m willing to eat. Tried a few beans; figured out I’m not really a bean person. If they’re buried in something like chili, I can stand a few, but not enthusiastically. Finally tried roasted soy beans (soy nuts) and chick peas. They’re ok, but nothing I would have gone out of my way to eat previously. If they still have the good fiber and protein, this might be one way I can tolerate them.

I’m not a recipe type of person. I tend to want food that’s ready to go with very little preparation. While there’s nothing bad about whole foods just as they are, maybe that makes them a little less exciting? I mean, even apple slices with peanut butter takes time I’m not always willing to spend. Thus I just eat apples, which is fine. Anything that’s super fun also seems super expensive. I love berries, but they’re pricey. Frozen are cheaper, again, which is fine. Blueberries are the cheapest where I live. I’m not super bored of them yet, but still, you see the point if one of my main fruits is frozen blueberries. I do potatoes with spices, but there are only so many spice variations you can dump on them. Steamed broccoli and mushrooms are fine, but again, no longer mixing them in pasta dishes (because I can’t stand whole grain pasta) and not sprinkling cheese on them, it’s like yay, spices and olive oil if they need moisture. Flavor infused olive oils are more expensive (sigh). Do you see the pattern? Thus my initial quandary with tofu – uhm, what do I do with it? Squeeze the water out, put more water and seasoning in, gah, I don’t want to spend that much time on it. I'd eat it right out of the container if it wasn't bland. Anyone out there sell tofu that's been seasoned and baked into something that tastes like immitation cheetos or such?

Exercise is fine too, but I’m still not feeling super motivated or those happy endorphins you’re supposed to get. Thankfully youtube has lots of videos to search, since I’m still off my feet and was told to not even try chair walking because it could put too much tension on my calves, which would in turn stress tendonts into the foot. The videos I do like, I don’t want to watch too much because then they get irritatingly repetitive. But I save the links and bookmark them and make notes when to start watching if they have a 2-3 min intro where they simply yap about themselves and their workouts. So far it's slightly more motivating to stick with a whole video than to try to do a series of exercises on my own, taking frequent breaks and losing track of how much I've done and probably not doing nearly as much as I should. Yay for youtube.

Tofu is Our Friend

Friend of mine corrected me on tofu care, and I've already bought more to try again. At least the taste and texture was tolerable for me. Also need to try soy nuts.

On another funny note, apparently throwing a fit does burn calories. That is, the scale budged shortly after that post. Still, I have noted to never tell anyone in real life. I made the mistake of telling a co-worker, and they minimized my efforts even after I told them how hard I'd been working. They chalked it up to stress and said it must have fallen off without any effort. Uhm, excuse me, no. I have been eating better (whether I feel like it or not), exercising and going to bed hungry because I'm afraid I don't deserve to ingest anything else. I know I haven't made much progress, but I have been working at it. I ordered pants 2 sizes smaller and although they're snug, they pretty much fit. I realize that's a drop in the bucket. I guess I should have realized not to trust anyone in real life with anything personal too. Public Service Announcement: if someone in your life tells you they've worked really hard at something (anything) don't be a dork and tell them it's nothing. Be encouraging. Even if you aren't convinced they have. Don't insult them and tell them you know what their life is like when you have no clue. Ok? Thanks.

All Day Shoes

I love my shoes. To a point. When I get home, I want to take them off at the door. #1: germs. #2, my feet get tired of them. Don’t get me wrong – my Hoka Clifton 9s are the most comfy shoe I’ve ever had (thanks for the recommendation, Shanna!). It’s like walking on small but stable bouncey balls kids sit on. Instead of step, step, clod, clod, it’s Boing! Boing! But I have to lace any shoe up pretty right or my heels slide out. Especially with the new fasciitis inserts I got. Yes, I’ve tried the little pads you can glue to the inside of the heel. Don’t ask. Even after only 8-11 hours of wearing them, the laces are so tight, I have permanent welts/sores on my feet from where the knot ties, below the ankle. But after meeting with a valid podiatrist (and after several months of pain) I’m going to follow the recommendation to wear shoes everywhere. The good news is they aren’t pushing a night splint yet. Those look like medieval torture. I like to fidget my feet all the time anyway, especially at night. Observing me, you’d think I have restless leg syndrome (I don’t, I’ve asked). If you put me in one of those, I swear I wouldn’t be able to sleep and would be exhausted and probably crazy by morning. So indoor shoes it is! Also more icing, anti-inflammatories, stretches, and pain gel. But the constant shoes thing is the biggest adjustment. Four weeks until my follow-up appointment. Here we go.

Waiting for (Weight Loss) Results

I’ve pretty drastically changed my diet (food intake) over the last couple of months and upped my activity. I can’t help be disappointed how slowly the scale is moving. After all, I’m doing physical therapy and all the exercises would be easier if I had less weight to lug around. Plus some of the exercises are causing pain on my joints, so even if I went in for my foot, my knees are protesting, and duh, the best way you can help that is to lose weight. I’m trying!

Not sure how much activity I used to do, but doing 10 minutes moderate activity was pushing it when I started out last summer(ish). I’m up to 30 now, or minimum 25 minutes cardio-ish and weights and PT exercises in addition. I went from eating Idk, maybe 5 fruits and veggies a week to 6-10 every day, and that usually fills a person up to eat less of everything else. Nixed most meat and only have cheese maybe once a week. Before that, I was contemplating if I could even get through a day without dairy, as I’m a pretty good addict, and cheese is essentially kryptonite. Went from high sugar desserts most evenings to dessert being a bowl of light popcorn or berries. Come on. How is this not helping? No, my clothing is not significantly loser, thanks for rubbing it in. What gives? P.S. I’m still waiting for this supposed improved feeling of wellbeing that’s supposed to follow either eating better or increased activity (let alone both). How long does it take for that to kick in?

Meanwhile, I’ve been icing my foot at least 3 times a day and gulping down ibuprofen as instructed, despite the fact that neither help for pain. I had a follow-up appointment at the orthopedic place and he chastised me for easing up on that. I only stopped since it’s been months, and the last person said not to worry about it and only do PT. Whatever. He said injections won’t help, it’ll probably tear or require surgery. Finally got a referral for a podiatrist, (from when I asked my PCP last October/November) so I went ahead and scheduled that for a second opinion. I only have a couple more PT appointments, so not sure what else to do except continue those exercises at home. With my heavy self, it’s nearly impossible to do those on one leg, let alone 3 sets of 15. Guess I have something to shoot for.

Tofu Review

Mixed feelings about tofu, but overall, I think I’ll pass. I think I could get used to the taste and texture. It’s the maintenance that bugs me. Once opened, it supposedly only lasts 2-3 days in the fridge. So you’d better have big plans to use it fast. The package we got was supposedly 3 servings, but I would have split it in 4 or 6, so that’s a lot to use in a couple of days. Then if you don’t use it all immediately, you’re supposed to drain and refill it with water every 24 hours. Seriously? That’s exactly what I’d like to do – daily maintenance on food I’m not ready to eat yet. Idk, this idea is weird to me, and I don’t mean in the good way. Maybe soy nuts would be good alternative? Haven’t tasted them yet. No one sells them where I live. Sure, I can order a few pounds from Amazon.com, but I thought it would be nice to test them out first before getting a bulk bag. I can buy some dried beans, soak and roast them myself, but come on. Just to try a taste. Eesh.

Trying Tofu

Tried tofu today. Not quite the first time, but rarely had it before. Don’t recall being impressed. Didn’t think I was missing anything, but the book I’m reading has a whole subsection devoted to how wonderful soy is, and its protective properties agains the cancer I’m attempting to avoid. Said it was nature’s version of the chemo prevention they want me to take. It was edible, but I should have marinated it in something different. We picked the only marinade we had in the pantry, and thought it might work with stir-fry. I think I should simply get a jar of mined garlic and let it soak in that next time. That or liquid smoke or something. Looked up ways to cook it next time. I’m not a fan of soy milk (glack), frozen is probably mushy, and not sure where to buy soybeans fresh, so tofu seemed like worth a shot. Had no idea what to buy, so we got extra firm. Sure seemed soft and squishy, but what do I know. Maybe soy nuts? If those were flavored, that certainly has potential. I know salt is generally bad, but I enjoy smoked salt and seasoned sea salts, so I could probably wash them down that way. I need to try nutritional yeast too. Who knows, maybe that would be a magic combination. Will have to check out the bulk section some time.

Fun Fitness Equipment, Fasciitis Still Flaring

Got some basic mini-loop exercise bands so I can do physical therapy exercises at home. I could do other exercises too, so they seemed like a decent investment. This was not for New Year Resolutions, as I’ve been thinking about exercise bands for a while now. But what type? What resistance level and what brand? Thought I’d start with the type they have for therapy and go from there. At least it’s something. There are a couple other fun items from PT that seem fun but I’m not sure I’d use them long term or not. Balance boards are not awfully expensive. Balance pads are more tempting (used differently) but much more pricey. While I was browsing I stumbled upon these things called balance pods, which simply look fun. If nothing else, they have a spiky texture one could probably use for self massage, or play with your feet under a desk. But I digress.

Now the issue is as much as I’m doing PT, I’m not really improving pain-wise. It’s less painful than when I started, but not much less than after the first couple of sessions. We’re doing good exercises, even though I kind of roll my eyes at the idea you’re not supposed to try them at home (thus maximizing the number of visits they can bill). Today I did minimal walking (the bare minimum to function at work) and I have throbbing pain after I’ve sat down. Probably less than 2000 steps. That doesn’t seem like great progress. Am I that old that my body isn’t responding properly? One can get injections of PT doesn’t work, but I used to think injections were more for people with injuries or worn down cartilage or such. You can’t undo some injuries or replace cartilage, that kind of thing. But just to cure a nagging pain in my heel, that would suck. Maybe not the end of the world, but I feel like more of a wimp than I would like.

Chemoprevention

So chemoprevention. Second least favorite word at the moment (cancer is #1). I don’t have cancer (yet) so I don’t need Chemotherapy, which is worse. Chemo comes from the word “chemical” supposedly, but the connotation I’ve always had is that it’s basically poison. That’s why it’s so miserable for people who have to go through it. Chemoprevention is using chemicals to prevent cancer, and likely less much less miserable, but it still has this nasty connotation, like I’m being forced to ingest poison for the idea I’m avoiding something much worse. Keep in mind there’s nothing technically wrong with me now. It’s all in the name of prevention. Maybe all prescriptions are some sort of poison, as they’re usually man-made concoctions, but I’ve never thought of them so negatively. Whereas most prescriptions advise of possible side effects, my brain is convinced that I’m guaranteed to have the negative effects of chemoprevention, because chemo is such a nasty connoted word. The chemoprevention I’m starting next month has 400+ drug interactions, 1 of which I am taking and they are choosing to ignore. Also has interaction with a couple dozen vitamins and supplements I would normally take (at least occasionally). At least 50 very common side effects and serious side effects include stroke and vision loss. Some side effects make my existing conditions worse (arthritis) and also take away supplements I’d been taking to help (ginger, vitamin c). Sounds like fun, right? Get to take this toxin a minimum of 5 years. 10 years may also be beneficial. I guess we’ll do 5 and re-evaluate then.

Leg & Foot Pain Everywhere

No, not really in that much pain. This is my progress update. Right foot is hurting pretty good again, but not quite as bad as it was initially. Left leg can straighten out better now, but burns if I stretch it. Not that nice comfortable feel, but not quite the burning sensation I had when they worked me too hard in the first place. Sort of in-between. Wondering if I would be better off getting a different PT referral. Just don’t have a great feeling about this place.

Physical Therapy Idiots

I know getting into shape isn’t always easy and can sometimes be quite painful. Usually physical therapy is a bit more gradual and less painful. That is, I normally don’t go in and have searing pain during the exercises they demand I keep doing, and wind up being sore for close to a week.

The problem is we’ve only been working on one foot/ankle/leg, and then they decided to throw in an exercise using both, and my other leg was not up to the challenge. Is this another ploy to get more visits out of a person? Let’s put you in extra pain, even if we don’t outright injure you, and then make you think we’re the only people who can get you back to square one, even though we’ve already used (and thus wasted) several of your visits. The owners/management of this business keep sending out stupid e-mails about how much they care and if there’s any little thing that you’re concerned about to please contact them. I don’t want to ruin a person’s employment, but the one guy ignore me so much while he socializes with the others, he doesn’t seem to want to be there. I have been patient, but he doesn’t seem to know what he’s doing in the first place. Maybe he needs more training or supervision. I don’t want to be the guinea pig where he ignores me half the time, can’t figure out what his directions are, and then tells me to do things that I can’t because he doesn’t have the equipment set up correctly, or he’s holding a resistance band, but with no resistance, because he’s too busy trying to talk to the more seasoned and muscular guys there. Maybe if this wasn’t going to cost me a couple thousand dollars I’d be more patient. But when I can give you a laundry list of what he did wrong after every visit, and on top of that, puts me in so much pain because he thinks it’s good . . . I’m not a body builder. And I’m pretty sure body builders don’t progress well if they’re in so much pain they can’t move either. Duh. So that’s how physical therapy is going. Aren’t you glad you asked.

Physical Therapy Gold-diggers

I like the idea of physical therapy in general. Slow careful recovery versus trying to do too much too fast. Exercises that build up slowly, vs. say, the ones I did this summer that surprisingly put me in ridiculous pain.

Here’s my beef with some physical therapist situations. I’ve heard on more than one occasion that they really milk the process to get more money. Require visits more frequently than necessary, or drag the process out longer than the person’s situation needs. Let’s face it; they’ve got a lot of control how fast you can recover if they won’t help you and you legitimately need their help, like for the physical manipulation and massage (that you can’t figure out how to do yourself). I used to show up for an initial visit, and yes, they do assess and take measurements, but then they get down to business. The one I went to this time did measurements and spent the rest of the time explaining the process and basically their business model, and how everyone, no matter what is wrong with them, will require at least 20 visits to get better with lasting results. I can see not rushing the process or getting overly optimistic that once things feel better you’re done and don’t need any followup. But at some point it feels like they’re over-doing it, and the point is they want financial security.

I went to one guy who was nice enough, and maye not over-doing it, but basically talked to me as if I was his therapist, whining a lot about money. He didn’t make enough working under someone else, so he started his own business. Fair enough. But he made comments like the only good patients people want are the ones who’ve had surgery because they need more visits, and people with lesser issues can drop earlier and then he’s scrambling fore more business. He complained about the cost of laundry (towels used for heat/ice packs) and his minimum water bill being too high even if he hardly used any water. So you hear things in general, and stuff like this, and when they seem too clingly that you absolutely HAVE to show up 3x a week even though all you’re doing is exercises that you could do at home and they ignore you the rest of the time because you do know what you’re doing . . . you start to wonder.

So the first vist was not actual physical therapy, even though they charge it as such. The issue is a lot of people only have x many visits their insurance covers, so it does seem wasteful to spend one on them showing up just to measure and leave. I’ve heard lots of complaints like this, so I know it’s not an isolated practice. Someone’s in the hospital, the PT shows up to introduce themselves, asks if they have any questions, and says they’ll come up with a plan/strategy for next time. But they waste a whole PT session. It’s annoying. The the patient’s side of the financial thing. Even if we’re not penny-pinchers, we’re paying x amount per visit, and to be required to have 20 vists, say, times $30-40 a visit , that’s a sizeable investment of $600-800. Again, if you’ve had a serious injury or surgery, you may well need this. But if you’ve got a smaller tweak or sprain and you bounce back well, some honest therapists would agree you don’t absolutely need that many visits, especially if you’ve got a solid exercise plan in place and are diligent in completing, to continue strength and stability. You don’t need someone to babysit you doing exercises in a corner that don’t require specialized equipment. My PT referral suggested 2 vists a week for 2-4 weeks. While that might have been on the low side, 8 weeks of 2-3x a week is twice as much, and they state this is the set amount for everyone, without even knowing what’s wrong with them. So you can see why I am given to wonder.

Waiting for Physical Therapy (Foot Pain Continued)

Foot pain got bad enough that I stopped doing the exercises until I get physical therapy. Maybe I’m not doing them precisely right. I got a referral; now waiting for the appointment. It got bad enough that I wans’t sleeping well and it didn’t make sense anymore since it was making it so much worse. In the meantime I got a couple different compression sleeves, gel heel cushions, gernic diclofenac gel, and re-useable elastic bandage wraps. I’m not doing any walking, which sucks. I will be so out of shape when I finally get back to walking. The other day I running errands was painful enough and limping/overcompensating probably isn’t a good idea either. Who knows how painful PT will be. They usually know what they’re doing and massage, ice or give instructions how to keep discomfort reasonable. But who knows.

Mattresses

You know the story of the Princess and the Pea? I’m starting to wonder if the pea was kind of besides the point. That the other point of the story is that some princesses want that much cushy bedding in the first place. We bought a crappy yet expensive mattress a couple of years ago and my spouse has pointed out that our health may be more important than toughing it out even though this mattress seems almost indestructible and may last quite a while.

Been looking online at several options, mainly trying to avoid pushy sales people. Against all reasoning, we stopped by a store Thanksgiving Weekend to see what was available in real life (we were in the area doing something else). Some of the online places have trial periods, but we don’t have a lot of room to keep the mattress from hell as a spare in case we nee to return an online purchase and don’t want to sleep on the floor. Unfortunately one of the main reasons we stuck with the mattress from hell was because we got rid of the horribly worn out predecessor and couldn’t logistically return it fast enough. That, and we foolishly thought maybe it would somehow break in after more time (trial periods were shorter then). It’s been years, and that thing is not breaking in.

Back to the in-store adventure. The sales guy was nicer than I ever could have expected. Previous experiences involved people telling me what I needed despite my telling them that’s not what I wanted. Or the vultures, such as in car dealerships. This time, no one pounced; we eventually asked if someone was available, and he simply pointed us towards options based on our questions and reactions. What a concept. Since we weren’t seriously considering buything anything, tried to ask vague questions about materials and layers in case such properties might be compared to other mattresses. And since we weren’t really considering, also pretended we didn’t have a price-range in mind. Maybe it was good practice for a poker face when we found my ideal mattress included a poofy mattress topper sold separately that cost twice as much as our previous expensive mattress. Even if we only got a half size topper for my side of the bed. Only princesses can afford that price of sleeping luxery. See, at least some of the online mattresses have warranties for 15, 20 years, or even “lifetime.” This one somehow charged an extra $100+ just for the 10 year and had a shorter trial period. Again, learning from our previous experience, the showroom model was great. Exactly what we wanted. But the one that arrived was not. Even though the showroom model was only 2 months old, they assured us it only needed a little longer to break in (and that’s what we were hoping anyway, since we would othertise be stuck without anything to sleep on but the floor). So all I’m saying is you’ve got to jump up and down on the mattress hoping to break it in sooner than later so you know if you really want it since half the time you have it is breaking it in, and this store’s trial wasn’t especially long (3 months). Then the cost per year, assuming it only lasts 10 years . . . I guess it was nice to dream.