Pulling myself out of a Funk

Finally pulling myself out of the funk of the last few days (possibly the last week).

It helped that I had a new toy to play with today – my dream computer keyboard. I am not a gamer, but I am picky on keyboards and type relatively fast. Or, I used to. #1 obstacle is muscle weakness after shoulder surgery. Seriously, it doesn’t matter how much you squeeze that ball that comes with the sling – your whole arem and hand get weak and atrophied. #2, I have the cheapest stiff keyboard from work. My job is to type quickly all day long. Why not allow a person to have a better keyboard? This is the argument I would make if I thought I could convince them to pay for this keyboard at work. I doubt it would fly. Especially since I discovered my ideal keyboard is a gaming one. Sorry for all gamers out there who might think it’s sacrilege for a non-gamer to own one. Despite my muscle weakness, I still can type pretty fast if I’m not fighting a crappy keyboard, pounding the clunky keys into submission. The fun backlighting wass a plus as well.

Ahem. Back to shoulder recovery. I think the lesson is to hang in there and do the work even when it sucks and it’s boring and doesn’t feel like it’s getting any better. Sure, it’s normal to get tired of the drudgery, or feel discouraged. But dang, shoulder surgery recovery is nasty. The amount of pain, the amount of time being in that much pain . . . arduous does not seem like a strong enough word. It can get flat-out exhausting at times. Fight to survive and endure another day. And get ice packs. Lots, and lots of ice packs. Had no idea I'd still be icing so much 8+ weeks after surgery. Icing my opposite non-operative shoulder as well, as iritated as it's gotten, still doing all the work. I think today is day 59. Day 1 is the first day after surgery.

Angry Muscles (Rotator Cuff Surgery Recovery)

Every once in a while I have a day that kicks pain up a few notches more than expected, and I feel terrible. This is one of those days. Started light strength exercise in physical therapy yesterday. I was tired and sore at the time, but waking up . . . Brought on those thoughts of why the heck did I even have surgery? What was I thinking? Oh yeah. I thought I was in pain and this would be a good solution. Boy was I an idiot. I had no idea what real pain was.

Last night I used the sling temporarily, to see if it would help my arm/shoulder rest. It didn’t help, so I gave up. I used my early morning pre-work time to ice instead of starting PT. I often regret it if I don’t get a complete set of PT done pre-work, so this is a big deal. I snuck in little sets of 5 or 10 of an exercise as often as I could throughout the day. It hurts to even raise my forearm from hanging down to the right angle (former sling position). Let alone holding anything (I'm allowed up to 1 pound). I refrained from messaging my physical therapist that my arm hated him today. Idk how many nerve endings are in those muscles, but I swear they all feel irritated and aggitated, having woken up after all this time in dormancy.

Eventually forced myself to complete every single rep of assigned exercises. I barely eeked out a couple optional exercises. Usually I do a slew of extra exercises even if they're not officially assigned. If we've done them in a PT session, I figure it wouldn't hurt to do a few every day at home. Used the cheap Frisbee I got yesterday, for one maneuver (it's the right size) and used my new pulley to get my arm up behind my back. Didn’t do much, and but I tried.

PT - Active Movement

Not sure if I'll have the patience/motivation to go through and insert posts for the last few weeks. Suffice it to say rotator cuff repair was the most painful thing I've ever experienced and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. Even typing takes a stupid amount of effort at this stage. Currently 5 weeks 5 days since surgery.

Did first active exercises with my arm at the end of PT today. Slowly lifted arm straight out in front of me. Did so in front of a mirror to make sure I didn’t cheat by scrunching my shoulder up at the time time. Not sure why my collarbone/clavicle area feels tired and overused. Anyway, discussed this is NOT one I should cheat by doing at home all the time. I tend to try to do at least a few exercises here and there that I learn, even if they’re not daily assigned ones. Technically I’m not really supposed to do any active movements and stay sling-bound at least 6 weeks. Longest 6 weeks ever. Cannot emphasize how arduous it is only having one hand/arm for that long. 6 more weeks before I can hold or lift anything above one pound. This includes using more than that much effort to say, open heavy doors, open bottles/jars, etc. I’m not even mousing with my dominant hand yet. In order to type I am supposed to use my other hand to lift my hand up to the appropriate position on the keyboard. No mousing or 10-key.

I return to work next week. 4 people have quit in the last 6 weeks, and we’re already understaffed. No way I’m going to volunteer for OT. Not even sure how well I’ll be able to adjust to typing all day with the current strength. Have to re-arrange my WFH area so I can type with my arms in my lap or supported by pillows. Fun stuff.

Add tired-ness readjusting to FT work, lots of PT multiple times a day, not sure how regularly I’ll want to post here either. We’ll see.